I’m walkin in that room, seein’ you.
You’ve told me everything that they do.
And you’re smiling, laughing with that gleam in your eyes,
I’m looking right through you, hearing all your cries.
And sometimes it seems that no matte how bad things get,
I always know you’re there, and there’s nothing we’ll regret.
But now I see you, a new you, somehow they changed you.
I see through you, though I knew you, something in there just consumed you.
I’m rolling and turning from nightmares of how they choke you,
But reality is always so much worse: they broke you.
Something’s changed, in your eyes- in your mind, we’re out of time.
I’m holding on and on to the deepest parts of you and crossing my line.
And I was praying that I’m wrong- that somehow my mind was lying
‘Till I knew the lies were true and I sat up all last night crying.
Today I learned a lesson so that now I understand,
And I wanna help you in any way that I can.
But what I proved to you is how my promise is untrue.
And the sky is so damn stark- it’s so cloudy and so blue.
Kinda like the way I told ya how ashes are morbidly white.
And this time I see there’s just no way to fight.
Am I gunna lose you? But I’m already lost.
They broke you but I’m the one broken and crossed.
And I’m seein’ that it’s my fault- you woke up all alone
Said I went to my house but in your arms is where I’m home.
But I need you now, baby, oh my god I need you back.
Need to feel your embrace ‘cause your warmth I just lack.
And without it I’m just alone- so very cold.
And it seems like eons without secrets to which we’re told.
I wanna be there, baby….i just wanna be here,
Wish I could say I’m standing strong and showing you no fear.
But as three lines with red vines that line my veins,
Streak down my arm, slit my wrist, all in vain.
Close my eyes, see your face as mine turns pale.
Wanna hold on longer but I’m failing to inhale.
My life is held strong but by only a narrow sight,
Don’t take your eyes off me, baby…they’re my "shadow light." (in honor of B)
The wind blows so strong that’s my narrow life- it fades.
Couldn’t anyone understand that they all had it made?
I’ll follow you baby…anywhere time will tell again.
I’ll follow you baby…I’ll walk straight through hell again.
Crossing that bridge with the lessons I’ve learned.
Playing with fire and not getting burned.
Crossing the river of Styx before death.
I paid my price when I expelled my last breath.
But I’m not a God, not immortal, I won’t live.
I’m the noble friend who had nothing left to give.
So they thought that they could break you to make you better,
But they’re just breaking me with every single letter.
So when I’m broke and I’m done.
When the battle’s over and I haven’t won,
It’s like a young child with his toys at play,
When one of them is broken it’s just thrown away.
I’m watching slowly and carefully while I dissipate.
This is fate, my checkmate, nothing will alleviate.
My dad, I watched him go for your years of pain,
It’s taken only four days for you to drive me insane.
How could I be enough? How could I be aboard?
Not enough to keep you from the place that you hate more.
I’m watching them treat you like the fucking child who couldn’t.
They act like it’s a fallacy that you’re the one who wouldn’t.
And my nightmares are getting worse, they’re dangerously teeming,
I’ve woken more than once to my own voice screaming.
I’m sorry, I’m sorry! I’m sorry, just don’t worry…
It wasn’t your fault either, there’s just no hurry.
Oh my god, this devious and deceitful state of romance,
This state where I’m left with only death to dance.
Chre-Ku ‘De, the dance of death, my final kiss.
Bid farewell to the skies and lower me to bliss.
An understanding reach of how I’m understood.
How each rapport is shown and etched in my coffin’s wood.
You’ll excuse this like before, excuse this as a bore,
And you’ll never even hear me when I walk outside your door.
Wishin I was on the floor- broken and abused.
Now I’m just and caught up and confused.
Doin 186 on the freeway and not having a care,
Nobody fuckin said that life was ever fair.
And a steady tear drop stains my face as I write.
Maybe everything will be different tonight.