ten years ago, when dad died,
I thought of life as a simile to the dying tide.
I sat back and watched as my tide faded away,
leaving the clam sea open in every way.
Ten years ago, I was afraid of taking my life,
even though I knew it would always be a strife.
The fear had stopped me that one sorrowful day,
but it hurts so bad I only wish I could say.
Ten years ago, I wasnt ready to die.
So all I could do is sit there and cry.
From this pain, I am unable to get away,
even when I sit on knees and pray.
Ten years ago, I knew it would come to this,
I stare down the hall and pray its me you wont miss.
Mom, dad, I love you, though here I lay,
perhaps my death will hold the demons at bay.
Ten years ago, I watched my life as it slipped on by,
not able to stop it, not able to try.
I close my eyes, and my world turns gray,
and I set the knife gently upon the tray.
Ten years ago, it started the beginning of the end,
and I had nobody here to be my godsend.
Today, I end it like everyone who feels this way does,
its over, its done, and i never was.